Greetings from lovely, sunny Hyde Park!
Another day, another week in London gone by. Well, almost a week in London, I also spent a few days up in Tamworth, for my friend’s engagement party.
It’s been a week full of small steps, one after the other, towards the version of myself that I want to be. The version which is bubbly and full of life and smiles. Outgoing and confident.
For the most part though, I am not that version. I am quiet and scared, and feel like I am a massive downer on every situation. But something that I did this weekend made me feel like I was less of a burden. It’s something my psychologist always told me to do, something which disproves your paranoia.
I asked my friends if they thought my presence was a burden, and I was immediately shouted down. They said it was lovely just having me there, that it was okay that I was a bit quiet, that it didn’t matter if I was a little low. They said they appreciated me coming at all.
And the way they said it, with so much sincerity and insistance, made me feel convinced that they were speaking truthfully. And it made me feel so much better, and very glad that I had asked what they thought, rather than just sitting around making assumptions with my own negative mindset.
So that’s my advice for today: if ever you’re worrying about what other people think about your mental illness, just ask them what they’re thinking – most likely it won’t be anything bad. You might be worried that they mind you asking, I certainly was when my psychologist urged me to do so, but as I always say, people want to help you, they want to be generous and open-minded, and they won’t mind reassuring you.
So ask your friend, your partner, your parent, your sibling, your cousin, ask them about whatever you worry about, and let them tell you that they don’t mind, that it’s okay, and that they’re there for you.